Stood Up

I got stood up. In the 36 years that I have been alive, I have never been stood up. I have gotten last minute calls/emails/texts to say that the person was delayed or needed to reschedule, but I have never had anyone to just not show...until Saturday. I met a new guy online. We've talked and emailed and texted for about 3 weeks or so and hit it off pretty well. Saturday would have been our first time meeting face-to-face. I really excited. Jay was finally okay with me going out with another man. He told me to dress cute, have fun, and come back and tell him all about it. I was nervous because I haven't actually dated anyone since I was married, but I was also very excited. I liked this guy a lot. I had already warned him that I was hesitant about getting emotionally involved with a married and because I didn't want to fall for him only to realize he couldn't fall with me.
We'd arranged to meet at a jazz club/restaurant. I arrived, sent him a text to let him know I was there...no answer. After sending repeated texts and calling several times, I left. I sent Jay a text to let him know that I was headed back home. He told me to come hang out and have drinks with him instead. So, I head across town to where he was. As I was pulling in the parking lot, new guy sends me a text. So, as Jay and I are enjoying our drinks, I'm texting back and forth. New guy is down the street from the club at his friends and asks me to come there. At first, I say no...I'm hanging with jay now after all. But, I'm pissed and I need to get some things off my chest. I convince Jay that I need to go see new guy...just to tell him off...and I will be home in an hour. I head back across town to new guy's friends apartment and I lay into him. I explain that I am very understanding. I know my role. I understand things come up, kids get sick, wives (yes, he's married) throw a fit, etc., etc., etc. What I do not understand is inconsiderate people. I don't mind sharing a man, but I'm spoiled and I'm selfish with my time. When it is my time to be with you, it is my time. If something is going to keep you from giving me my time then at least have the decency to let me know. He didn't do that. As much as I wanted to stay and hang out with him, I couldn't. I couldn't start things off that way. If I did, he would feel like that was okay all the time and I know me. My feelings would get hurt and after the first couple of times, things would get real ugly, real fast. I'd just rather not go there.

I had planned to stop the story here, but I just got an IM from new guy. He feels that he needs to get his house in order. He doesn't think that he can give me the time or attention that I need or that he wants to give (his words, not mine). I just said ok. I'm hurt...I trusted that he knew what he was doing. I feel like I was led on and I'm going to miss talking to him during the day. I'm sad...I really thought he was boyfriend material (despite being married...I know). And, I'm a little pissed. This is something he should have handled beforehand. Why am I the one who has to get punished because he didn't take care of his business? At this point, it's whatever. I hope he gets his life together, but I can't promise I'll still be interested when/if that happens.

Edited, once a again to say...This is also the first time someone has broken up with me. I am just in shock over here.